I haven't had the best week or so and I also hadn't seen a good friend in a long time. I decided to remedy both points by meeting up with said friend and having a day of fun. By calling it a day of fun beforehand, you can guarantee that it will be fun.
We decided to start the day (of fun) by meeting at the train station and getting the first train that was leaving to somewhere nice. Some time ago, this would have struck fear into my heart. Unplanned train travel? Gah. But not now; I was not only not phased, but I was actually looking forward to it. A phrase I had to dust the cobwebs off of a little.
Both my friend and I are depressives and have anxiety issues and many of our chats involve talking about such issues. We have talked over more cups of tea and sat in comfortable silence with each other more time than I can remember and are always on hand to try to get to the bottom of our feelings, whether we find an answer or not. But this day we just enjoyed being.
We walked in the sun by the river, visited an antiques fair, window shopped, ate well, drank tea and answered life's most important question: "Would you rather be a donkey or a horse?" Only today as I wrote this, did I realise that we didn't turn to our most frequent subject of our thoughts, feelings and moods. We were just us. Two people.
Towards the end of the day, as we walked to the train station, we crossed over a bridge and stopped to look over the edge at the water below. I cannot stand on such a bridge without thinking of jumping off it or something falling over (such as my possessions). It's a terrible weakness of mine and I can't help but have to step back a little, just in case. This may have put me on edge a little, but that was nothing compared to the train home.
Each carriage was full when we pushed our way on and stood in the middle of the aisle. I imagined we probably looked quite funny as I gripped the seat as hard as I could and occasionally made noises to myself while my friend quietly gritted his teeth. Neither of us talked much and it was clear we were getting through it as best we could. Two stops later and almost everybody got off, we took our seats and breathed a sigh of relief and continued talking as if nothing had happened. That, my friends, is progress.
We promised each other that we would try to do things like that more often, knowing how good for us it had been. Not only as a way of spending time with a friend who understands, but because it really was good for our brains. To give them a day off from being a depressed person and just let them be a person. Being us was really good for us.
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